How Far- Martina McBride

There's a boat, I could sail away
There's the sky, I could catch a plane
There's a train, there's the tracks
I could leave and I could choose to not come back
Oh never come back

There you are, giving up the fight
Here I am begging you to try
Talk to me, let me in
But you just put your wall back up again
Oh when's it gonna end

[Chorus:]
How far do I have to go to make you understand
I wanna make this work so much it hurts, but I just can't
Keep on giving, go on living with the way things are
So I'm gonna walk away
And it's up to you to say how far

There's a chance I could change my mind
But I won't, not till you decide
What you want, what you need
Do you even care if I stay or leave
Oh, what's it gonna be

[Chorus]

Out of this chair, or just across the room
Halfway down the block or halfway to the moon

How far do I have to go to make you understand
I wanna make this work so much it hurts, but I just can't
Keep on giving, go on living with the way things are
So I'm gonna walk away
And it's up to you to say
YeahI'm gonna walk away
And it's up to you to say how far

The Next Nine Months Could Only Be More Eventful If I Was Pregnant

The next nine months are going to be craaaazy!

First off I had a doctor's appointment today. Last weekend when we went into Panama City, my step-mom mentioned that she noticed quite a bit of hair loss. Ever since the twins were born I've noticed it too, but I just thought it was me losing the fullness of pregnancy hair. Apparently, it should have stopped by now, nine months later. So, she made me promise to go see a doctor about it. She's afraid I might have a low thyroid (hypothyroidism) or low iron (anemia). So, I made an appointment and went to see the doctor today. I got some blood drawn and have another appointment on May 8th to find out the results. I made the appointments, but I'm still not convinced it's anything. If it does happen to be anything, I'm suspecting anemia instead of hypothyroidism...I don't have any of the symptoms Y is dealing with.

May 20th I start back at FSU. I've got four more classes to take and then I can graduate. I'm taking three criminology classes and one psychology class. Two classes will be in the evenings from May to the beginning of July and the last two classes will also be in the evening from July to August. Six weeks for each class. It's probably going to take up most of my time but it's not like I update this thing regularly anyway. *smirk*

Also, right in the middle of classes will be the twins first birthday. The fourth of July is their actual birthday so we're going to have a pool party over at our apartment that afternoon. It's mostly going to be a family gathering with a few close friends invited. I've tried to start planning some of it now but there's only so much I can do so far in advance. Plus, I've got to get my butt into gear if I'm going to be seen in a bathing suit. *smiles*

August I will graduate from FSU and then come the job hunt in Panama City. We've all but been given my Dad's house so it's almost 100% definite that we'll be moving. He is planning on being in Pensacola by the first of the year so that means we're also going to have to move by then. So, right after graduation comes the job hunt and packing up all our crap and hauling it back the two hours from whence we came. I still cannot believe we're moving back to Panama City...but that house is just not something we can pass up. We'd never be able to find something that big for as cheap as we're going to get it.

I just really hope that I'll be able to do everything that I'm working on. I don't want anything to suffer because I've overextended myself. I'm trying to take one thing at a time. Unfortunately, some things overlap so it's going to be difficult to do at times.

Tomorrow a friend of mine and I will be driving to Atlanta for a concert on Saturday. We're going to see Panic at the Disco. I'm really excited. It will be the second time I've seen them in concert. The last time I saw them was for my birthday in November '06. It was the greatest concert I had seen. They put on such a great show. I'm not sure what they'll do this time since they've scaled back their music so much, but I'm sure it's still going to be great. Since Deidre and I are part of the PATD fan-club we get early entry into the concert. The concert doesn't start until 6pm, but we're going to get there at 4p so we can get close to the stage. The only thing that really sucks about going to see PATD is the fact that most of the fan-base if adolescent girls that just want to get up front because "Oh em gee...Brendon is soooooooooo hawt!" *Gag* That was the same problem we had at the last two Fall Out Boy concerts. Everyone wants to get up to swoon.

Anywho, I'll be updating when I get back with some pictures from the concert. Until then, I leave you with a message from Emma:


Britney Marie

Might Be Leaving Tallahassee

Over the past weekend I was hit with some pretty big news. My dad, who has lived in the same house for 14 years has decided to move to Pensacola. I was not expecting this at all. It came as a complete shock to me. Nothing even hinted that this was coming. It was dinner then *bam* news.

The first thing out of my mouth when he told me was "I want your house." And I do. I grew up in that house and I really don't want to see it going to anyone else. So, Ricky and I are in negotiations with my dad and my mom (who is still on the deed) to purchase his house. It is five bedrooms and three bathrooms...3500sq ft. To us it will be a mansion.

Unfortunately it is in Panama City, the one place I swore I would never move back to. I guess that goes to show you that you can't always tell what the future will hold.

Luckily, my dad has told me he would work with us as much as possible to make sure we get the house because he wants us to have it. Also, it is right next door to my grandparents (paternal). So, the twins will definitely get to know their great-grandparents.

My dad won't be moving until January so we still have a good 9 months to plan everything out.

I'm really excited.

Britney Marie

Riddle

Question: How many times do you have to call the maintenance men to come replace a fluorescent light bulb in your kitchen so you can see?

Answer: I'll let you know when they actually come fix it. Three times and counting...


*UPDATE*
Three. The answer is three.

Britney Marie

Laughing Matter

Today the girls came home from Panama City. Ricky and I missed them like crazy! They were quite happy to be home as well.

Here's Emma:


Here's Olivia:


They were so sleepy from the trip home that they fell asleep right after their 3pm bottle. When we put them to bed Liv kinda woke up, but Em was still out.


Britney Marie

Total Request Live

Well...it's not exactly "live", but it is total request.

It's come to my attention that my Flickr buddies would like to see some videos of the twins. Since I'm too poor to shell out any money for a pro account on Flickr, I figured I could do the next best thing. Blog them. So here they are, some videos of the twins.

This first one is the twins discovering the baby wipe box:



This one is Emma doing her best to crawl to a toy she's spotted:


This last one is Olivia playing with a toy radio she got for Easter:


Hope you guys like them!

Britney Marie

No Kids = Freedom No So Much Freedom

Since my in-laws came in to pick up the twins for the week, I thought I would be able to get some errands done during the day. Grocery shopping and just going to stores in general with twins by yourself is a big hassle and I try to avoid it as much as possible. Ricky gets home at 1:30pm anyway so usually we both go wherever we need to. But since the girls are both gone Monday-Thursday I thought it would be the perfect opportunity to head to some stores I never get a chance to go to.

It was a good plan...in theory. Actual execution didn't go so well.

Tuesday I went to meet up with Ricky for lunch. Everything was great. When I went to leave WCTV my car wouldn't start. To make a long story short I had to call AAA and get a tow truck and now my car has been at an automotive repair shop since then. I still haven't gotten the call to tell me what exactly is wrong with it.

This morning I got up at 3am and took Ricky to work so I could use his car all day. Not exactly the freedom I was picturing.

Britney Marie

Is It Me, Them, Or Neither?

Lately I've started to worry about the twins. I know I'm not supposed to compare them to other people, but it's really hard not to. Everyone at Ricky's work keeps asking if they're walking yet. No, only one of them is barely crawling. They're not sitting up on their own yet, they're not pulling up yet, they're not talking yet, they're not walking yet, they're not using sippy cups yet, and they just recently started rolling over really good. All of this at nine months old. I just feel like they should be doing so much more.

Part of me wants to blame myself for not working with them as much as I should. I feel like I should be right there with them 24 hours a day right by their sides instead of letting them do some things on their own together.

Am I crazy? Am I paranoid? Am I not doing enough? I hate this feeling.

Britney Marie

The Lady And The "Dee Dee Dee"

The transition into hated lady who lives in the apartment complex is well underway. Last night about 11pm I hear girlish giggling and screaming from the pool which is right next to the twins bedroom window. I look outside and see eight or ten people out there. This isn't the first time people have been out there after hours and lately they've been teenagers throwing lawn chairs, beer bottles and televisions in the pool. I look at the clock to double check that it is in fact 11pm (the pool closes at 10pm) and I go get my sneakers. I march myself outside in my pajamas, no socks and sneakers and proceed to tell those people what's what.

"Excuse me..."

They didn't hear me.

"EXCUSE ME..."

"Oh, Hi!" The dad, who was sitting on the edge of the pool says.

"Uh, my kids window is right there *points to the window 20 feet away* and my kids and husband are trying to sleep. Can you guys keep it down?"

"You heard the lady. Be quiet"

It's still really weird for me, who is only 22 years old, to be referred to as "the lady". I felt kind of bad because apparently the people who were doing all the screaming were little girls about 7 years old...and they were having a sleep over because it's Spring Break. I didn't feel bad for long though because their parents should know better than to have a sleep over on a Tuesday night...people have to go to work even if their kids are home from school.

Oh, and a funny story that I almost forgot.

I go to our apartments office to renew our lease. I get there and one of the ladies asks whether the twins are identical or fraternal. I say they're identical. The other lady who works there tells me she is an identical twin too. (This is important.) So, the twin lady then asks me if I had "boys, girls or one of each"! COME ON! How can I have a boy and a girl if they're identical!!! I can understand, maybe, hearing it from someone who knows nothing about twins, but coming from someone who IS a twin...DEE DEE DEE! (I've been watching a lot of "Mind of Mencia" lately, forgive me!)

Britney Marie