This weekend, the family and I were supposed to travel to Panama City for the Red Stocking Review. My mom is in it every year they do it. Ricky woke up this morning with the flu. So, all day I've been taking care of both twins and Ricky. I'm so exhausted. Plus I only got three hours of sleep last night. We found out that our rent is going up from $715 a month to $750 a month...and Ricky and I can't afford it. We can barely make it for $715 as it is! And I wish I was exaggerating. So, now we've got to come up with some way to make up the difference or find a new place to work. And our lease is up on the first of May. Yeah, that's right, we have less than three months to find somewhere else to live, come up with deposits, or figure out a way to stay here.
I've also decided to finish up at FSU. I've got ten hours left which is equal to three classes and a one hour course. All that I have to take is a psychology class for my minor and the other ones can be whatever I want. I'm thinking about just doing the three classes as online classes so I don't have to leave the house and I can do my work at my own pace. I did that the last semester I was at FSU and I managed to get an A- in the web-based class. So I know I can handle the workload.
Another thing that has been on my mind is my weight. When the twins were born, I lost thirty pounds of the 62 pounds I gained. Somehow between the time I lost it and now, I've gained ten of it back! I got rid of all my maternity pants (gave them away to a friend who is expecting this month!) and went shopping to get new pants. Now my new pants no longer fit. I hate going out of the house now. Every time I have to get dressed I get so depressed. And it stays on my mind all day. I keep telling myself that I'm going to start dieting...and I do...then I get hungry. And I fail. it's so easy to tell yourself you're not going to eat when you're full! Ugh, I feel like such a failure.
On top of all that, I've got the normal household things to keep up with. Taking care of twins is no easy feat and I know it's not going to get any easier. Once they get mobile and start crawling/walking it's just going to be that much harder. I try to keep up with all the chores around the house, but sometimes I just need a few hours to myself. So, sometimes things don't get done. I have a pile of laundry that needs to be folded and put away, but I just don't have the drive to do so at the moment. The litterboxes need to be changed and the floors need to be vacuumed.
I feel terrible for the way I'm feeling now. (Does that make any sense?) I know Ricky is sick and can't help it and all, but I can't help but feel angry that my weekend was stolen away from me. We were supposed to be in Panama City, seeing a show, watching movies with friends, visiting the parents and grandparents and getting some alone time together. I guess I'm not upset with him, I'm just upset at the situation.
Typing all this has given me a headache...or maybe the headache could be from the rainy weather outside. Whatever the case, I'm going to close.
Britney Marie
Friday, February 22, 2008
Thursday, February 21, 2008
Big News
I spoke with my adivsor at FSU yesterday. I need 10 hours and I can graduate. One psychology class, two electives, and a one hour p.e. class. I think instead of the p.e. class I'll take another online elective. But after the summer semester I will be an FSU graduate. I'm so excited!!
Britney Marie
Britney Marie
Friday, February 8, 2008
Romantic Rambo
My life is boring. There has been nothing interesting to write about. Ricky and I have been playing a lot of Guitar Hero, I've been watching a lot of tv on dvd, and the twins have been growing like weeds. I can't believe they're already 7-months old! I can't believe the things they're doing. They both flip over from their backs to their stomachs constantly, but can't seem to go the other way. Every morning when I go in there to get them out of bed I'm greeted by the biggest "dubba toof" (as Ricky says) grins! Oh, oh, and SuperChunk has a third tooth coming in. One on top. Now Ricky calls her "trippa toof". SubChunk doesn't look like she's getting a third tooth for a while now, but I'm sure it won't be too long.
Tomorrow my dad and step-mom are coming in for the day. Ricky and I get to go on a date. I guess it's going to count as our Valentine's Day date because we won't be able to get away from the kids on the actual holiday. We're planning on going to dinner and then a movie. Not sure about the restaurant, but we're going to see the new Rambo movie. How romantic. :)
Britney Marie
Tomorrow my dad and step-mom are coming in for the day. Ricky and I get to go on a date. I guess it's going to count as our Valentine's Day date because we won't be able to get away from the kids on the actual holiday. We're planning on going to dinner and then a movie. Not sure about the restaurant, but we're going to see the new Rambo movie. How romantic. :)
Britney Marie
Monday, January 21, 2008
The Sunshine Oven
I want to move somewhere it snows. In my 22 years of existence, I have only seen snow three times. Once when I was four, once when I was 15 and once when I was 16. That's it. Three times. I believe there is something wrong with that.
I've been trying to talk Ricky into moving me somewhere it snows...I don't even care where anymore. Just somewhere it snows a decent amount. My preference would be somewhere in New York or Pennsylvania, but I'm at the point where I don't care where. He could choose Alaska or Canada and I'd say, "When do we leave?"
I hate Florida. I swear, Florida is an oven masked as a state.
Britney Marie
I've been trying to talk Ricky into moving me somewhere it snows...I don't even care where anymore. Just somewhere it snows a decent amount. My preference would be somewhere in New York or Pennsylvania, but I'm at the point where I don't care where. He could choose Alaska or Canada and I'd say, "When do we leave?"
I hate Florida. I swear, Florida is an oven masked as a state.
Britney Marie
Friday, January 18, 2008
A Weekend Alone...Well, Sorta.
Today my mom is coming up to pick up Super-Chunk and Sub-Chunk. My step-dad is out of town for two weeks and mom says she wants the company. Ricky and I had a previous engagement of a video game night at our house so we were unable to head out of town this weekend. Best of luck to her by herself.
Saturday is supposed to be a video game night here, but I was told yesterday that no one is going to be able to show up. Kinda sucks, but that leaves more time for Ricky, Sidney and I to watch crappy horror movies. I've got a few lined up including a gem called "Murder Party." Should be fun.
Nothing else really going on over here, except for the fact that I should be cleaning. I should always be cleaning something. Eh. I'll get to it later.
Britney Marie
Saturday is supposed to be a video game night here, but I was told yesterday that no one is going to be able to show up. Kinda sucks, but that leaves more time for Ricky, Sidney and I to watch crappy horror movies. I've got a few lined up including a gem called "Murder Party." Should be fun.
Nothing else really going on over here, except for the fact that I should be cleaning. I should always be cleaning something. Eh. I'll get to it later.
Britney Marie
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
I Hate Sleep. It Ruins My Whole Day
Something told me that I should just stay up for the three hours. Something told me that going to sleep would be a bad idea. Something was right.
I finally poured myself into bed around 4am. That meant I had three hours until I was supposed to get up and get ready to take the girls to the doctor. At 7am, when my alarm was supposed to go off, there was silence. I'm not exactly sure what caused me to wake up...but I did at 8:30am. That's right! I've got thirty minutes to get up, get dressed, shower, get the girls up, feed them get them dressed, pack the diaper bag and drive to the doctors.
As I sleepily glance at the clock and notice what time it is I shoot out of bed and run around the house in a panic. No time for a shower. No time to get dressed. I did manage to change out of my pj pants and into jeans. Yep, still wearing the same shirt from yesterday...and covering my gross hair in a baseball cap.
I go into the twins room and get them up and changed. I thought about putting them in onesies and jeans, but looked at the clock again and decided not to. They both went in their pajamas. I got them both into the car seats only to realize that when one of our cats got locked in their room last night, they peed in Sub-Chunk's car seat. The same one I just strapped her into.
I managed to carry them both into the living room and then began the frantic search for my sneakers. Behind the couch of all places. Then I realize that they hadn't eaten anything and would soon be screaming for food. So I run into the kitchen and quickly make two bottles to take with us. This whole time, the twins are completely silent except for a few cooing giggles.
The whole time all of this is going on I am reminded of a line from Mel Brook's movie "Young Frankenstein." It goes, "Could be worse." "How" "Could be raining." Somehow that line always make me feel a little better. Except today. I open the sliding door blinds to reveal...rain. Now it's worse, 'cause it's raining.
I get both twins in the car with minimal rain hitting them and myself. I look at the clock again. Ten minutes til 9. And I'm only five minutes away from the doctor. I rule.
At my doctor's office they have a big window right next to the front door so you can see everyone who is coming in. There are three families sitting inside, all looking out the window. (This is important....They're all looking out the window.) I come up to the door with one kid in each hand, a diaper bag thrown over my shoulder and am even more wet now. Does anyone open the door for me? Hells no. They sit there and look at me all dry from the inside. So, I set down Super-Chunk, open the door, prop it open with my foot, pick up Super-Chunk, wedge myself into the doorway, kick it open a little more behind me and pretty much fall into the room. Everyone is looking at me...still. I hear a few people whisper, "Aww, look she's got twins." Like they didn't see me outside. People suck.
When I finally get them all signed in and in the waiting room, a nurse comes up and tells me I have paperwork to fill out because they're updating their system. Nevermind the fact that none of my information has changed. So, instead of getting to feed Sub-Chunk or Super-Chunk, I've got to fill out pointless paperwork. After I get all that filled out, I can finally feed someone. I pick up the Sub-Chunk and manage to get the whole bottle in her before they call us back.
I had called a few days ago to see if they could reschedule us for an afternoon appointment so Ricky could be there to help me with them. They told me the earliest they would be able to get us in if we rescheduled was March, so that wasn't an option. They did tell me, however, that a nurse would be available to help me since Ricky couldn't. I thought that was a great idea. And it was...in theory. See, for something like this to work, a nurse would actually have to help me out instead of, y'know, doing nothing.
I get back to the little room and get Sub-Chunk undressed so she can be weighed. The nurse takes her so I can undress Super-Chunk. After they are weighed (Super-Chunk is 16lbs and Sub-Chunk is 15lbs) the nurse brings them in and leaves. After an hour, yes that's right, a freaking HOUR, the twins start to get restless. They're undressed, cold, uncomfortable, somewhere unfamiliar, and I am unable to hold them both to comfort them. I am alway so afraid I'm going to drop them when I hold them both on something other than carpet. By this point they're both crying because I can only hold one at a time. When the doctor finally comes in, I'm pissed. There was only one person ahead of me on the well-check side of the office. An hour is unacceptable. So, when the doctor is all, "So how are we doing today?" I snap at her. "I have been here an hour, I was told I would have some help and both my kids are uncomfortable!" I felt kinda bad after that so I tried to be as nice as possible with the rest of the question/answer session.
When the doctor left, I was told that a nurse was getting their shots ready. Yes, that's multiple shots. Each twin had four shots plus some liquid. They did pretty good with the shots. Yeah, they both screamed bloody murder, but it took a few seconds for them to realize what was happening and by that time they were already on the third shot.
After their shots, the nurse just leaves. No offering to help get one of the screaming twins dressed. Nothing. So, I've got two screaming, thrashing, crying kids on this high table and I'm supposed to get them both in their clothes. Yeah. Right. I manage to get Super-Chunk in hers and then I've got the problem of getting one screaming thrashing infant into a car seat while the other infant is screaming and thrashing on this high table.
The good news to this is that once I got them in their car seats they got all happy again. And they were silent except for happy coos until we got home. They whined a little as I was getting them out of their seats, but once they got into their swings, they were passed out within literally 30seconds. We've been home an hour and they're both still asleep.
Since they're sleeping, I'm going to take this opportunity to go take a much needed and deserved shower. Hope all your days go better than mine has so far.
Britney Marie
I finally poured myself into bed around 4am. That meant I had three hours until I was supposed to get up and get ready to take the girls to the doctor. At 7am, when my alarm was supposed to go off, there was silence. I'm not exactly sure what caused me to wake up...but I did at 8:30am. That's right! I've got thirty minutes to get up, get dressed, shower, get the girls up, feed them get them dressed, pack the diaper bag and drive to the doctors.
As I sleepily glance at the clock and notice what time it is I shoot out of bed and run around the house in a panic. No time for a shower. No time to get dressed. I did manage to change out of my pj pants and into jeans. Yep, still wearing the same shirt from yesterday...and covering my gross hair in a baseball cap.
I go into the twins room and get them up and changed. I thought about putting them in onesies and jeans, but looked at the clock again and decided not to. They both went in their pajamas. I got them both into the car seats only to realize that when one of our cats got locked in their room last night, they peed in Sub-Chunk's car seat. The same one I just strapped her into.
I managed to carry them both into the living room and then began the frantic search for my sneakers. Behind the couch of all places. Then I realize that they hadn't eaten anything and would soon be screaming for food. So I run into the kitchen and quickly make two bottles to take with us. This whole time, the twins are completely silent except for a few cooing giggles.
The whole time all of this is going on I am reminded of a line from Mel Brook's movie "Young Frankenstein." It goes, "Could be worse." "How" "Could be raining." Somehow that line always make me feel a little better. Except today. I open the sliding door blinds to reveal...rain. Now it's worse, 'cause it's raining.
I get both twins in the car with minimal rain hitting them and myself. I look at the clock again. Ten minutes til 9. And I'm only five minutes away from the doctor. I rule.
At my doctor's office they have a big window right next to the front door so you can see everyone who is coming in. There are three families sitting inside, all looking out the window. (This is important....They're all looking out the window.) I come up to the door with one kid in each hand, a diaper bag thrown over my shoulder and am even more wet now. Does anyone open the door for me? Hells no. They sit there and look at me all dry from the inside. So, I set down Super-Chunk, open the door, prop it open with my foot, pick up Super-Chunk, wedge myself into the doorway, kick it open a little more behind me and pretty much fall into the room. Everyone is looking at me...still. I hear a few people whisper, "Aww, look she's got twins." Like they didn't see me outside. People suck.
When I finally get them all signed in and in the waiting room, a nurse comes up and tells me I have paperwork to fill out because they're updating their system. Nevermind the fact that none of my information has changed. So, instead of getting to feed Sub-Chunk or Super-Chunk, I've got to fill out pointless paperwork. After I get all that filled out, I can finally feed someone. I pick up the Sub-Chunk and manage to get the whole bottle in her before they call us back.
I had called a few days ago to see if they could reschedule us for an afternoon appointment so Ricky could be there to help me with them. They told me the earliest they would be able to get us in if we rescheduled was March, so that wasn't an option. They did tell me, however, that a nurse would be available to help me since Ricky couldn't. I thought that was a great idea. And it was...in theory. See, for something like this to work, a nurse would actually have to help me out instead of, y'know, doing nothing.
I get back to the little room and get Sub-Chunk undressed so she can be weighed. The nurse takes her so I can undress Super-Chunk. After they are weighed (Super-Chunk is 16lbs and Sub-Chunk is 15lbs) the nurse brings them in and leaves. After an hour, yes that's right, a freaking HOUR, the twins start to get restless. They're undressed, cold, uncomfortable, somewhere unfamiliar, and I am unable to hold them both to comfort them. I am alway so afraid I'm going to drop them when I hold them both on something other than carpet. By this point they're both crying because I can only hold one at a time. When the doctor finally comes in, I'm pissed. There was only one person ahead of me on the well-check side of the office. An hour is unacceptable. So, when the doctor is all, "So how are we doing today?" I snap at her. "I have been here an hour, I was told I would have some help and both my kids are uncomfortable!" I felt kinda bad after that so I tried to be as nice as possible with the rest of the question/answer session.
When the doctor left, I was told that a nurse was getting their shots ready. Yes, that's multiple shots. Each twin had four shots plus some liquid. They did pretty good with the shots. Yeah, they both screamed bloody murder, but it took a few seconds for them to realize what was happening and by that time they were already on the third shot.
After their shots, the nurse just leaves. No offering to help get one of the screaming twins dressed. Nothing. So, I've got two screaming, thrashing, crying kids on this high table and I'm supposed to get them both in their clothes. Yeah. Right. I manage to get Super-Chunk in hers and then I've got the problem of getting one screaming thrashing infant into a car seat while the other infant is screaming and thrashing on this high table.
The good news to this is that once I got them in their car seats they got all happy again. And they were silent except for happy coos until we got home. They whined a little as I was getting them out of their seats, but once they got into their swings, they were passed out within literally 30seconds. We've been home an hour and they're both still asleep.
Since they're sleeping, I'm going to take this opportunity to go take a much needed and deserved shower. Hope all your days go better than mine has so far.
Britney Marie
The Sun'll Come Out Tomorrow
I should be sleeping right now. I've got to take both twins to the doctors in seven hours...and that's seven hours until their actual appointment. That doesn't include time to feed them, dress them, dress myself and get out the door plus drive time. Ugh. Tomorrow is going to suck...er...I guess that would be today...today is going to suck.
I'm just not tired yet. I normally don't head off to bed for another hour or so. Right now I'm just starting to feel the tiredness kick in, but it's not enough for me to actually fall asleep. Plus, anytime I start to think about all the housework that I didn't do today..it makes me want to stay up even longer so I can get this place livable again.
Friday my mom is coming up to pick up the twins for the weekend. My step-dad is going to be out of town, so she wants some company. I told her good luck! Friday my best friend is also coming up to spend the weekend with us. I haven't seen her since Christmas. Saturday we're supposed to have Ricky's co-workers come by and play some video games. More specifically, Guitar Hero (I, II & III), Wii Bowling, and Mario Kart. We always have a good time when they come over.
I was hoping this weekend that we would be able to go see Juno...I've really wanted to see that since I saw the preview, but I think our weekend is pretty much filled up now. Perhaps another time.
Britney Marie
I'm just not tired yet. I normally don't head off to bed for another hour or so. Right now I'm just starting to feel the tiredness kick in, but it's not enough for me to actually fall asleep. Plus, anytime I start to think about all the housework that I didn't do today..it makes me want to stay up even longer so I can get this place livable again.
Friday my mom is coming up to pick up the twins for the weekend. My step-dad is going to be out of town, so she wants some company. I told her good luck! Friday my best friend is also coming up to spend the weekend with us. I haven't seen her since Christmas. Saturday we're supposed to have Ricky's co-workers come by and play some video games. More specifically, Guitar Hero (I, II & III), Wii Bowling, and Mario Kart. We always have a good time when they come over.
I was hoping this weekend that we would be able to go see Juno...I've really wanted to see that since I saw the preview, but I think our weekend is pretty much filled up now. Perhaps another time.
Britney Marie
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