Funny Things My Kids Have Said *July Edition*

Emma to Olivia: "I'm not Strawberry [Shortcake], I'm LarryBoy! I crush you!"


Each girl is on an opposite end of the couch for time out at the moment. Emma is taunting her sister.
Emma: "Olivia, get up. Do it! Do it!"


*after putting on her new black shoes*
Olivia: "Look Mommy! I've got tapping shoes!"


Emma: "Mommy, I want to paint Daddy's toenails."


Emma and Olivia: "We want to watch 'Pedos and the Penguins!"
Me: "*snickers*"


*After putting on her Batman ghetto cap with her Easter Sunday white dress up hat*
Emma: "Okay, I have to go to work."
Me: "Alrighty. Where do you work?"
Emma: "At Grammie's house."
Me: "What do you do at work?"
Emma: "Feed the ducks."
Me: "Wow! That's a nice job."
Emma: "Yeah, I know."


*the kids are playing pretend*
Olivia: "Moono! What are you doing?"
Emma: "I'm not Moono. I'm The Batman!"


Emma: "Olivia's fighting me. Emma's angry."


Emma: "Oh Daddy...I got my baby..."
Ricky: "What's your baby's name?"
Emma: "Hailuh. Hailuh Baby."


Every time Emma gets something taken away from her by me, she always gets Olivia to get them back. For example, I just took Emma's cookies and candy away for her kicking her sister.
Emma: "Olivia, get mommy to give me back my stuff."
Olivia "Give Emma back her stuff!!" *punches me in the leg and runs off* "How's that Emma?"
Emma: "Uh, not quite."


Emma just stuffed her plush Backpack (from Dora) with everything she could find, from books to Veggietales plush to candy. She had me help her put it on and her blanket around her neck. Then she looks at me and says, "I'm ready to see Ms. Marilyn. And I'm ready to see Grammie."


Emma: "Mommy, I watch 'Pedos and the Penguin'"
Me: "Yeah, I don't think that's right, Em-Em"


Emma: "Mommy! I poop a big girl!"


*from the bathroom*
Olivia: "Look! Another poop. He's swimming!"


*after seeing the frozen hamburger meat on a plate to defrost it*
Olivia: "Mmm, mmmm, yummy! My favorite!"
Me: "Your favorite is frozen hamburger meat?"
*thinks for a moment*
Olivia: "No. That's gross."


Me: "Emma, what is in your hand?"
*Emma shows the plastic microphone*
Me: "Don't hit your sister with that."
*Look over to see Emma riding her sister like a horse and hitting her in the head with the microphone*
Me: "*sigh*"


Me: "Emma, what is your full name?"
Emma: "Uhhhmmmm..."
Me: "Emma...Leigh...Gravatt."
Emma: "Emma...Lee...Toofat."


Emma: "Mommy, have some 'coffee'."
*uses a spoon to shovel it in my mouth*


*talking to her blanket*
Emma: "This is Mommy. He is a girl. He's my friend. *smiles*"